How to Tell if Your Partner is Cheating on You

Copyright 2006 David Maillie

We hear about it and see it on TV talk shows like Oprah, Dr. Phil, Ellen, and of course The Jerry Springer Show. We just hope it will never happen to us. Cheating is awful in a relationship. It is devastating and usually leaves permanent emotional scars if it doesn’t end the relationship. Unfortunately most partners don’t know about the cheating until they are told about it by a caring friend or relative. Here are some definite signs that by themselves may not be indicative of cheating, but together should send off a big warning signal that something is going on. Recognizing this cheating early on can save oneself from much heartache and trouble that will grow the longer it persists.

A sudden increase in late night work outside the home and travel could indicate your partner is cheating. It may just be innocent and maybe they have a new boss, demanding new clients, or a new demanding project, but they may also have a sexy new secretary that they are suddenly paying a lot of attention to. Communication is the key here, if you have any doubts call them. You won't know if you don't communicate with them. Here's a great tip, if you are feeling doubts tell your partner. If they aren't cheating they have nothing to be worried about and they won't get defensive or mad. If you can’t reach them, they make lots of excuses or they won’t take your calls then a flag should go up. Midnight or midday rendezvous are not inducive to a good relationship and they cannot hide it forever. No one is perfect, even international spies make mistakes. Check their clothes and travel items. Is there an unfamiliar perfume? Something that doesn't belong? Receipts for possibly romantic dinners, hotels, lavish or romantic gifts, etc… (gifts are a huge indicator of cheating).

A sudden decrease in sex drive could mean they are getting it elsewhere. A temporary reduction in sex drive could just be related to increased stress or job duties. It could also indicate medical problems that should be referred to a doctor. Like prostate or urinary trouble. But, a sudden decrease in sex drive equipped with sudden late night work at the office and unexplained receipts for romantic dinners definitely means something is not right and should be checked into.

A marked defensiveness and new irritability expressed towards you. This could be your lover trying to hide their cheating by them throwing it back at you. “Why would you even ask or think that? You should trust me like I do you. Maybe you are the one having an affair. Where were you last night?” A new unforeseen defensiveness in itself is a very strong indicator of cheating. This defensiveness is almost always present in cheating. Just watch Dr. Phil, he knows this and asks the potential cheater why they are so defensive. What do they have to be so defensive about if there isn't anything going on?

Also the opposite of this defensiveness could indicate some infidelity or cheating. Is your partner all of a sudden being extremely nice to you. Are they buying you romantic gifts, dinners, flowers, etc… for no apparent reason you can think of? Is this way out of the norm for them? They may be going through feelings of guilt after infidelity. They may feel guilty for what they have done and are trying to console their feelings in this way after the fact. As seen on Oprah, this is a high indicator that cheating or infidelity has occurred. 95% of partners that have cheated experience feelings of guilt and will be extra nice to their spouse after the infidelity has occurred.

There are other numerous indicators that can be indicative of infidelity or cheating. These may not in themself indicate cheating, but when grouped together, the more indicators that occur, the more likely some cheating or infidelity is going on somewhere or has in the past and your partner may still be trying to cover it up

Online Scams: How To Avoid Getting Fooled

Beware of the three ways of getting fooled into giving up your money through seemingly innocent money-making schemes. Scams are all around us and it can be found in every single area of life, but more so in such areas where the risk is greater such as when dealing with credit cards, bank accounts and other activities which involve sending or receiving money online.

The Bank/Credit Card Email Scam:
If you get an email asking you to sign up to your bank account or credit card through the email because your privacy is under danger or just to receive a free gift or something: BEWARE! Do not sign up through the internet address provided in the email. If the email does make you anxious, go to the bank or credit card site using the address you know already or through searching the search engines.
How Does This Scam Work?
The senders of the email know that only a very few will sign up but that is all they need. When you signed up to the bogus internet address, they got your user and password. Now its time for them to party!

The Missing Millionaire Scam:
If you receive an email saying that they represent a dead or missing former ruler, high-ranking official or businessman from an African, Gulf or even Russian: BEWARE! They offer you a chance to earn anything between one to five percent of ten to fifty million. And for your co-operation only. Don't get sucked into this, for though they speak of giving you money, they will receive cash and from your account.
How Does This Scam Work?
They will ask you for your bank details in order to transfer the cash and then they will use that to transfer a small amount. Now, once you trust them, they will ask you for more personal and secure details because they "need" that to transfer the entire sum in and out of your account. What they won't tell you is that they will transfer all the money out from your account: theirs and yours.

The Make Money Fast Scam:
This is the most innocent of the lot, but that is also why it is the most dangerous. These are so-called companies that advertise that if you only sign up and use their system, you will mint money. Please do not fall for such schemes. They will pay you some money but then once trust is built, they will fleece your bank account. Remember that quick money scams are the surest and fastest way to lose all your money!

Conclusion:
Whatever you do online, always remember that the internet is not a safe place. Treat it like you would treat any other business venture and bring up your guard. If you play it safe and check out the companies before committing, you will be able to guard yourself against losing money to crooks.